Survival of the first month
We survived the first month! To sum it up: feedings, naps and nappy changes.Bringing Eva home was daunting at first, Mr. K and I had zero experience with regards to caring for a newborn, so the confinement nanny that was hired was a lot of help. When the nanny was due to leave after 28 days, we were left with a little bit of anxiety on how we would manage. At the same time, I felt relieved that we can finally get our privacy back. Living with a stranger can be very constricting at times, this is especially so when I am rather strict on cleanliness and hygiene. However, I encourage everyone to get a confinement nanny as post-partum recuperation is absolutely necessary. There is just too many duties when it comes to caring for a newborn, and in the first month a new mum should just rest and leave it to someone experienced.
Boobies and milk
The first month was a roller coaster ride indeed. First of all, breastfeeding was not as “natural” as it should be. I went through all the emotional attacks when the supply was not adequate. It also did not help that the nanny told me stories of “previous customers” who had an oversupply, which made me feel that there is something wrong with me. The truth is, I felt guilty and less worthy as a mother. This was on top of the numerous battles that I had with Eva to latch her on. The wailing and pain certainly did not help the situation. At the end of it, we decided to supplement formula with breast milk, because seriously at one point I do not want to be stressed out anymore, and it should not make me feel less of a mother.
I think most people expect you to breastfeed exclusively, but if you cannot, do not feel less of a mother. What really matters is that your child is healthy.
Perhaps one of the most melting moments from feeding are burping moments with Eva. Seeing these cute expressions really makes me smile.
Christmas at the K’s
This year’s Christmas was extra special with the arrival of our daughter Eva K. A new family member always bring new beginnings and a lot of joy to any family. Apart from Christmas presents, the biggest gift this Christmas must be our little bundle of joy.
We also celebrated Eva’s full month on Christmas Day. It was a private affair with only relatives, just the way we like it.
The truth is that it still feels a little surreal that our lives have been changed forever with lil Eva K in our household. Caring for a little one made me more ‘grown up’ I guessed. Our marriage grew even stronger because we know we shall tackle the challenges that come our way with courage and resilience. To quote what Mr. K said, from now on, there are going to be loads of “homework” when it comes to parenting.
So a very joyful and rewarding 2014 awaits. Let the homework begin. We can do it. 🙂
On the 26th Nov 2013, at 11:43 pm, I became a mother.
But for the journey thus far becoming a mother is more than what I could ever imagined.
People have commented that I am a ‘motherly’ person. I never figured out how can one tell if a woman is ‘motherly’ even when she has not given birth to any children. Whenever someone tells me about the fact that I am motherly, I take it as a compliment.
Meet Eva Khanashat, or ‘Eva K’.
Mr. K and I had left things to Abba Father in the area of parenthood. We did not “plan” to be parents but rather believe that if Abba God blesses then our child shall be a blessing to us and He shall provide, protect, educate and nourish this child. At the same time we believe that He would provide us with the wisdom, grace and favour as parents.
Eva was conceived at the most stressful period of my life, my Dad has been hospitalised due to an unknown infection and I was having a very difficult teaching practicum. Despite all that “stress”, Eva was protected throughout the first trimester and made it to the second.
Apart from serious fatigue and nausea I had very little pregnancy symptoms. I also did not have ridiculous food cravings. The second trimester was a breeze except that at the end of it I was diagnosed with mild gestational diabetes, which meant that I had to watch my diet and test my glucose level constantly. No doubt it was bothersome and annoying as I had to cut off all desserts and many other food, to the envy of others I lost a lot of weight. Despite that, Eva kept on growing very well as a “medium to large” size baby. There was a preterm labour scare but Eva was protected and grew to be a full term baby before she was delivered.
The journey was not without difficulties and scares, but Jesus was always protecting me and Eva along the way.
The Birth Story
Eva was scheduled to be induced at 38 weeks, she had grew to an approximate weight of 3.7 – 4.1 kg and had to be out. We scheduled to induce labour in the morning of 25th November. Contractions came in the afternoon and I wouldn’t say that was the most fun to have.
I went through 23 hours of labour… I do not even know how I survived through that. I also do not know how Mr. K could go through that with me, it must have been terrible to hear your wife in pain for 23 hours. Mr. K is such a blessing to me! I definitely married the right man. At some point of time, I only muttered “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” repeatedly. I even said “We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us” to Eva.
After 23 hours, I reached 10 cm dilation, I pushed and I pushed, I swear that I used my utmost strength. But I was exhausted, Eva was also exhausted, her heartbeat was very erratic by then. After that we tried assisted labour, but it was still unsuccessful. My gynae suggested caesarean section procedure because Eva needs to be out asap.
The whole operation to me was a blur but what I could remember was Eva came out like an angel to me. Because I was so exhausted and was on partial anaesthetic, all I saw was a stretched cloth and out came this baby that I had been carrying in my womb for 9.5 months. It was a very surreal feeling. On hindsight, the whole imagery reminded me of the “Lion King” where Simba was held. LOL….
But yeah, we made it. The three of us, this is a new chapter for the Ks.
Life with Eva
Life with Eva has been a joy, but it is also a steep learning curve. Throughout this pregnancy and birth journey Abba Father has taught me that whatever happens we shall be blessed and I learned to count my blessings and enjoy the journey every day. Truth is Eva and me came out of this safe and sound. Both of us have divine health and it is going to stay that way. Motherhood (despite the short length of it) has taught me to constantly rely on Jesus to provide, guide and to protect. It has also taught me to live one day at a time and be positive about what is to come.
Mr. K and I believe that Eva is from God, and we will be guided to be great parents. At the same time, Eva shall be protected by Him. We shall be anxious for nothing, because He shall be with us always.
Waking up to see Eva’s cute cherubic face makes me stronger to face the challenges which may come our way. Breastfeeding her was a challenge, but I was surprised at the unconditional love Jesus has provided me with, and I thank Him for this.
At the end of the day, despite the challenges, Jesus came through for us. So whatever that comes our way in the future, I am learning to rely more and more on Him.
It is untypical of me to write such a long post of my faith. But I felt that I needed to write this post of thanksgiving and perhaps to encourage those of us who may be facing great challenges. If we lead a life without challenges, why would we need God? What makes it wonderful is knowing that WITH the challenges we can still be victors with HIS ever present help.
I end this post with a photo of Eva at the end of week 1. Stay tuned for more updates on our little bundle of joy.